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Band 4

Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree

#governments #money #education #recreation #sports
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is authorities allocate a higher budget for educational background than on entertainment and sports.Now people are beginning to realize that
education
 is more important.Personally,
I
Accept space
,
tend to think that
education
 improves our Republic's rating.
Firstly
, it is well known that spending more
money
 on
education
 can decrease u
nemployment rate.
Suggestion
the unemployment rate
 What I mean here is that if more people are educated in c
ountry it
Suggestion
the country, it
the country it
a country it
is o
bviously
Suggestion
obvious
that the employment rate of that nation will be high.One of the main reasons behind
that is
 if the people are uneducated,
t
Accept space
,
hat reduce r
ating economy
Suggestion
the rating economy
of c
ountry.
Suggestion
the country
A good case in point is America has v
ery less unemployment rate
Suggestion
a very less unemployment rate
as the government provides best quality
education
 to the citizens at a very minimal fee and not only America and all developed republics.
On the other hand
, it can
also
 be argued that if c
ountry
Suggestion
a country
the country
has quality
education
 students will come from abroad.
That is
 to say that students pay us
money
 for training,
this
money
 goes to the budget and our tourism is developing. Take
for e
xample people
Accept comma addition
example, people
pay to learn in top universities.
For example
: Harvard University,
M
Accept space
,
IT, and other top universities. At least ten thousand people come to study at these universities every year.
f
urthermore cash
Accept comma addition
Furthermore, cash
Furthermore cash
turnover is increasing and
money
 in b
udget
Suggestion
the budget
is i
ncrease.
Suggestion
increasing
increased
 In conclusion, taking everything mentioned into account in our final analysis we can say that
education
 not only gives us l
earning but
Accept comma addition
learning, but
also
 imports us
money
 and many other things.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental
  • workforce
  • fosters
  • innovation
  • inequality
  • circumstances
  • outcomes
  • hygiene
  • private sector
  • initiatives
  • engaged
  • stability
  • cohesion
  • national pride
  • economic development
  • societal progress
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