IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table gives information about five types of vehicles registered in Australia in 2010, 2012 and 2014.

The table gives information about five types of vehicles registered in Australia in 2010, 2012 and 2014.
The given table chart compares the ratio and proportion of different types of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 which were registered in Australia in three distinct years namely 2010, 2012,
2014
Correct word choice
and 2014
show examples
. Taking the statistical data into consideration, the highest portion of passenger
vehicles
Use synonyms
 was registered in 2010 which was noted as 11800; followed by commercial modes with 2,300,000
while
Linking Words
, light
trucks
Use synonyms
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 the
last
Linking Words
 registered mean of transportation; recorded as 106,000. In terms of 2014's ratio, passenger
vehicles
Use synonyms
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
remained
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
peak
Correct article usage
a peak
show examples
 point and reached
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
13 million
whereas
Linking Words
 merely 1.3lakh non-heavy
trucks
Use synonyms
 went through
this
Linking Words
 process with
10.2
Correct article usage
a 10.2
show examples
% change from
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2010 to 2014. Turning to the rest details, there can be
close
Correct article usage
a close
show examples
 resemblance seen in the registered numbers of heavy
trucks
Use synonyms
 in the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 2010 and 2012 which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accounted
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
 just below 4 Lac with 8.3%.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, the ratio of motorcycle registration
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
climbed sharply and reached
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
7 Lac in the eventual year with 30.8%, which was considered to be a major change over the period. Eventually, a discrepancy of 6.1% can be noticed in the proportion of registered changes in light
trucks
Use synonyms
 and commercial
vehicles
Use synonyms
;
accounted
Correct pronoun usage
which accounted
show examples
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
 23.5% and 17.4%, respectively.
Overall
Linking Words
, all the five means of transportation followed an upward trend in giving three years.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words vehicles, trucks with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuation
  • trends
  • registration
  • vehicles
  • comparison
  • categories
  • growth
  • decline
  • significant
  • increase
  • decrease
  • surge
  • consistent
  • pattern
  • speculate
  • factors
  • economic conditions
  • consumer preferences
  • advancements
  • technology
  • implications
  • infrastructure
  • environment
  • societal behaviors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: