IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advatages of charging people for admission to museums owutweigh the disadvantages?

#museums #charge #admission #advatages #people #owutweigh
These days, the question of whether people have to buy museums’ entrance tickets or not has been receiving a great deal of public attention. While I accept that museum
admission
 fees have both benefits and drawbacks, I would argue that
this
 phenomenon bears more disadvantages than advantages. On the one hand, there are important benefits for museums when visitors are charged. One of the advantages is that museums have more budgets to give a boost to museums’ service quality.
This
 means that in the light of
admission
 revenue earning from entrance tickets, they might escalate significant investment in facilities, redecorate or even approach with cutting-edge technologies to make exhibits more attractive throughout audio and visual effects.
Furthermore
, most museums are public-funded/ state-funded so the higher the
admission
 revenue is earned, the greater proportion of the state’s definite budget can be poured into other fields
such
 as infrastructure, health care services. If art enthusiasts enter museums without fees, other public facilities like stadiums, zoo,
also
 need to be free, it seems to be impractical.
On the other hand
, I believe that there are some drawbacks, which outweigh these benefits. The principal reason for
this
 view is that museum, which charges a fee are likely to reduce their public because museum-lovers have a wide range of options to gain knowledge from museums. In fact, in the 21 century, with the industrial revolution and technology age, people can straightforwardly acquire information collections of priceless antiques and artefacts by a wifi-enabled device without a fee of charge.
Secondly
, if museums charge the amount of money, the contributions of museums for education may decline and it can have a negative influence on vulnerable art-lover
such
 as children, poor.
For example
, in Ha Giang province, which located in northern Vietnam, it is significantly challenging for local students to go to school, let alone spend money on visiting museums. In conclusion,
although
 charging people for
admission
 has some benefits, I argue that the disadvantages of
this
 free outweigh the advantages.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: