Some people think that the government should be responsible for crimes prevention, while others believe that it is responsibility of the individual to protect themselves. Discuss both the sides and give your opinion

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While

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it is often believed that the

government

Use synonyms

ought to be accountable for preventing crimes, there are others who think that

people

Use synonyms

are responsible for protecting themselves. In my opinion, the

government

Use synonyms

has more opportunities to reduce the number of offences. On the one hand,

according to

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some, it is the responsibility of the

government

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to protect

citizens

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from crimes because it can create strict laws, and I agree.

In other words

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people

Use synonyms

are afraid of breaking the law if there are deterrents,

such

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as fines, custodial sentences, or punishments.

For example

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, Singapore has really strict laws and

that is

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why it is one of the safest countries in the world.

Thus

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people

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do not turn to crime if they know about the consequences of

this

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decision.

Furthermore

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citizens

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pay taxes to the

government

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, and they accept that the

government

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will use

this

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to maintain safety. The

government

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can spend taxes to hire more policemen or to establish cameras.

On the other hand

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, some

people

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claim that

citizens

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should be responsible for crime prevention.

Firstly

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, the

government

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cannot control every step.

That is

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to say,

people

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have to know about the basic rules of remaining safe.

For instance

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, they should avoid walking alone at night or lock their door before leaving. If they follow these rules, there are more chances to be safe.

Secondly

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, the

government

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do not have access to private data and what

people

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are doing on the Internet, so when they want to buy something in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

online shop, they need to be sure about the security of

this

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shop.

To sum up

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although

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people

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have different views, I think that the

government

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is able to prevent crimes better than

citizens

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and the reason is that it has the money and power to do it.

s_syedyWed Jan 15 2025

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task achievement

The essay provides a complete response to the question, addressing both sides of the issue. Keep providing balanced discussion in your essays.

coherence cohesion

Ensure to use linking words accurately to improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction clearly outlines the topic and your stance, which is well-maintained throughout the essay.

supported main points

Your main points are supported by relevant examples, such as the reference to Singapore's strict laws contributing to its safety.

logical structure

The conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and reiterates your opinion.

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

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