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Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that children can learn effectively by watching TV and they should be encouraged to watch TV both at home and school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #tv #home #school
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It is irrefutable that
TV
Use synonyms
 is a very efficient teacher.
However
Linking Words
, I disagree that
children
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 should be motivated to watch
TV
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 both at home and at school. I shall put forth my arguments to support my views in the following paragraphs. There is no doubt that
TV
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 can be a powerful
mean
Fix the agreement mistake
means
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 of delivering information and a nice part of
learning
Add an article
the learning
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 process. Being an audiovisual medium more effective
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
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 can be achieved. What is seen is retained longer in the minds of
children
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. There are some things which can be very easily taught by visual illustrations. Even boring subjects like history can be made interesting with the help of
TV
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.
However
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, if
TV
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 is to be used as an educational tool
then
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 very strict monitoring would be needed as to what
children
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 watch on
TV
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. All those talk shows and soap operas we can see every day are a complete waste of time and can even have negative effects by distracting
children
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 from their studies.
Moreover
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,
the
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apply
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most
of
Change preposition
apply
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so called
Add a hyphen
so-called
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 educational programmes like National Geographic cannot replace books and academic lectures because they tend to entertain people and
have
Add a missing verb
do have
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not
Correct your spelling
no
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an
Correct article usage
apply
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aim to give deep and concentrated knowledge. It is highly unlikely that
TV
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 channel directors would abandon their profits and change talk shows to lectures and video lessons.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, if
children
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 watch
TV
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 in school
Linking Words
also
Rephrase
apply
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then
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 their interaction with the teacher would be limited. Teachers teach a lot of things apart from academics. They can come down to the level of the student and can
also
Linking Words
 stimulate
children
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 to learn. What is more,
children
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 would read less when they learn everything from
TV
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. Reading is an active activity as compared to
TV
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 which is a passive activity. So, it would be detrimental to the holistic development of
children
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. To put it in a nutshell I
pen down
Verb problem
am
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 saying that,
although
Linking Words
TV
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 is a very good educational medium, it should be used within limits and whatever
children
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 learn from
TV
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 should
also
Linking Words
 be carefully monitored by parents and teachers.
Submitted by bammesdilia24 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • source of distraction
  • educational content
  • entertainment shows
  • advertisements
  • inappropriate content
  • hinders learning
  • interactive learning opportunities
  • traditional classroom settings
  • one-way medium
  • individual learning needs
  • prolonged screen time
  • negative health effects
  • eye strain
  • poor posture
  • lack of physical activity
  • overall development
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • interactive, hands-on activities
  • passive television watching
  • participatory forms of learning
  • group projects
  • experiments
  • real-world problem solving
  • cognitive abilities
  • social skills
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