In many countries, people have health problems because they choose to live in unhealthy ways. What do you think the reasons for this and how can it be solved?

Nowadays, the internet society is advancing notably, and belong, we could get about medical technically information easily. I think that they are in something
issue
situations if they could not choose to live in healthy ways. I assumed two reasons that they choose to live in unhealthy ways.
Firstly
, they are poor or live in developing countries, many country's poverty is increasing. They do not afford to go to hospital or to buy medication when they catch a sick.
Therefore
, they cannot eat enough foods and drink water
that is
polluted,
then
they are exposed to starvation
that is
accelerated an unhealthy. Their environments are
also
dirty even in hospital if they could get a medical examination. The hospital cannot supply good or clean treatment to people. Poverty people do not have any choice that chooses to live a healthy way for themselves. I think that developing country could receive a support from WHO, NPO and WFP. In individual
supports
an active diversion requiring physical exertion and competition
sports
, we would donate clothes, shoes, notes and to contribute.
That is
one of solutions for helping them.
Secondly
, I have suggested that people do not have properly acknowledged about medicine or tend to wrong approach, because of a religion, culture and developing medicines. In
this
issue
, I think that the government should support for them,
for example
, they provide a school tuition and developing education, to build a school and cover medical experiment fees.
However
, if the
issue
belongs to culture or religion, it is difficult to change or fix their mind
that is
believed. Because culture has a long history and religion is habit of them for a long time. Protecting their mind,
then
teach
correct or
One who, or that which, corrects
corrector
can live more healthy approach to them are important. In conclusion, it needs to know the cause that they choose to live unhealthy style,
then
think a solution to each
issue
. I think that's a correct acknowledge and maintained surroundings are necessary for living in healthy.
Submitted by amour.une.fleur10 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: