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Band 6.5

Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more schoolwork. How do you think children should spend their free time?

#people #children #time #schoolwork
Nowadays, With the increase in technology, children's lives are very simple. Some people believe that children have so much free
time
 and from that they feel, They shall be used
this
 leisure
time
 to do more
schoolwork
. But, From my point of view, There are so many activities which they prefer in their free
time
. Personally, I believe that in
this
 free
time
, They play any sports to active themselves too.
To begin
, Children spent their 5-7 hours in a school.
Firstly
, They use their free
time
 to practice more
schoolwork
. From that, They connect themselves with these
work
 daily.
Furthermore
, Some parents believe that, If their children are only studying whole day, they are doing great in their exams and getting top rank in their academic
work
.
In contrast
, They excel in some sports which they have an interest
such
 as, Tennis, Basketball, Football, Cricket and many more. Apart from that, They
also
 do art and craft
work
.
For example
, Sketches, Canvas Painting and a lot more. From that, They shall have active themselves and
also
 feel relaxed and happy apart from the
schoolwork
.
Moreover
, In
this
 free
time
, They follow their hobby and their skills which are helpful themselves.
In addition
, They explore
this
 free
time
 in book reading for gaining knowledge, which makes them different from the others. I am not against to spend
time
 with
schoolwork but
Accept comma addition
schoolwork, but
 these activities are
also
 important to growth and development themselves. To conclude, I totally agree with my statements that, They have used their whole free
time
 apart from the school
work
 and doing same productive
work
 too, which makes them happy and from that they fit, active and gain knowledge from that. I completely agree with my decision on
this
 topic.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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