Some people concerned that young people spend their free time in shopping malls.It could be a negative effect or society. Do you agree or disagree?

Shopping in

this

Linking Words

era is like a new exercise

Accept space

most young people spend their free

time

Use synonyms

as a shopping activity, so they develop bad habits.I agree with the idea and put forward points. In

this

Linking Words

society of rapid economic development

Accept space

there are many new builds like

large

Suggestion

Large

scale shopping malls and online shopping,

also

Linking Words

merchants hope to earn a lot of

money

Accept comma addition

money, then

then

Linking Words

new products are constantly being introduced.Young people ’s thinking is not as mature as adults, they are easily tempted by new products

Accept space

as well as they may buy luxury goods because of their peer’s imitation and comparison. Cause consumption habits to change. Buying a lot of unnecessary things is only because friends have the same products and the values gradually alter. Young people have nothing to do when they have leisure

Use synonyms

time so

Accept comma addition

time, so

it will choice to go to shopping malls because department stores have indoor playgrounds, which makes students addicted.They will lose learning without knowledge, wasted a lot of

time

Use synonyms

and life skills.

Specifically young

Accept comma addition

Specifically, young

students

also

Linking Words

lost

time

Use synonyms

with my

family sometimes it

Suggestion

family, sometimes it

may realize that

meer

used to form the comparative of some adjectives and adverbs

bad

friends

Suggestion

friend

and commit crimes the reason is they are not mature in their thinking. To sum up

Accept space

there are many factors lead to

younger

Suggestion

young

people have free

time

Use synonyms

to consume in the mall like a comparison between friends buy goods and temptation in indoor entertainment. I think it more important is spending more

time

Use synonyms

with family and increase knowledge.

sun55555222

May 4, 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

237 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

retail outlets
consumerism
advertising
local businesses
neighborhood communities
sedentary lifestyle
obesity
socialize
amenities
economic growth
cultural homogenization
ecological footprint
entertainment
trends
brand loyalty
spending habits
mall culture
local shops
health implications
job opportunities
tourism
consumer debt
environmental impact
energy consumption
waste generation

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Some people concerned that young people spend their free time in shopping malls.It could be a negative effect or society. Do you agree or disagree?

In order to study effectively, it requires comfort, peace and time. So it is impossible for a student to combine learning and employment at the same time because one distracts the other. Is it realistic to combine them at the same time? Support your opinion with examples.

Topic: Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.