Some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympics is a waste of money and the money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Many think that the
Olympic
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games
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are a relevant
event
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that compares a
lot
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of different nations together , whilst others say
that is
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a waste of
money
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and it can be spent
elsewhere
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where it could be more beneficial for society , and I think that
this
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is the better option . In my opinion , the
Olympic
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games
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must be a part of our lives , but we should spend on
this
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event
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less
money
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than usual . On the one hand , many people feel that the
Olympic
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games
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need to be stopped because it is too expensive to recreate a place for it ,and the city where it needs to hold competition must spend a
lot
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of
money
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to build
this
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. In other views, the
Olympic
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games
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its about sport which
also
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needs to be in our lives , but if we can be more financially responsible we can save
money
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.
For example
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, if we were to do the next
Olympic
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games
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also
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be more economical in
this
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section , after the savings that we earn can be spent on people who feel the
Olympic
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games
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
a waste of
money
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.
However
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, the
Olympic
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games
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are a relevant
event
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because there are a
lot
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of sports and
athletes
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that spend more time and effort to be professional in their way of sport .
Additionally
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, the
Olympic
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games
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are held every 4 years, and it is not a problem to do them in an expensive way because
this
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money
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goes to the
athletes
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who play for their countries.
For example
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, all the
money
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spent to hold competition is for the hotel , food and uniforms for these professional
athletes
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. In conclusion , the
Olympic
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games
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are an important
event
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for
athletes
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to present themselves how they are in their sport , but to do
this
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event
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costs a
lot
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of
money
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that could be spent in a more important way
Submitted by akramkartzhan on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your task achievement and make your essay more relevant and persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of ideas between your paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph clearly transitions to the next and follows a logical sequence of thoughts.
task achievement
You have presented both views on the topic, which is essential for a balanced discussion in your essay.
coherence cohesion
An introduction and conclusion are present, giving your essay a structured beginning and ending.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Promotes global unity
  • Cultural exchange
  • Economic benefits
  • Job creation
  • Tourism
  • Infrastructure
  • Active lifestyle
  • Financial undertaking
  • Economic burden
  • Underutilization
  • Wasted resources
  • White elephants
  • Opportunity cost
  • Critical areas
  • Social welfare
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