IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

#internet #books #air #tickets #groceries
Nowadays everything tends to be simplified with the help of the internet. Which could be helpful for a lot of
people
 but
on the other hand
 it could make life difficult for others. Buying things on the internet has
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
 own perks and benefits, like getting the latest products,
while
 you don't have to wait in a queue to pay for it. Another positive thought on
this
 idea would be the fact that you can access almost every shop which has a webpage and to be fair there are very few shops which do not possess one. It requires little knowledge to order something online.
Basically
Add a comma
Basically,
show examples
 we need a telephone or a pc, access to the network, and some money when the
shipement
Correct your spelling
shipment
 arrives. If somebody
would tell
Wrong verb form
told
show examples
 mankind fifty years ago that there will be a time when we will be doing our
grocerie
Correct your spelling
grocery
groceries
 shopping, by sitting in front of a
sceen
Correct your spelling
screen
scene
 and pressing a few buttons, many would be in disbelief or would
aproach
Correct your spelling
approach
 the whole idea very sceptic. Another great thing about
this
 is that we can purchase from small objects to really large ones, which are
for example
 on the other end of the earth. Once you paid or ordered the desired product it will be
deliverd
Correct your spelling
delivered
 by couriers, which we have to say
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
most of the
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 are really fast and practical. Some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 can not even realize how lucky
this
 generation is, as we can buy products, see them,
select
Correct word choice
and select
show examples
 different colours,
shapes
Correct word choice
and shapes
show examples
 for
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, by just lifting one finger. On the negative side of the story would be the fact that we are not really there. We can not smell the groceries and check if it is fresh, try on a shoe and see if it fits, hold the brand new phone and check it. Shopping on the internet basically cuts out each and every sense
what
Change preposition
of what
show examples
people
 have. One thing is for sure
highlitened
Correct your spelling
highlighted
 and that would be the imagination,
beceause
Correct your spelling
because
 if you can not hold the product, smell it,
see
Correct word choice
or see
show examples
 it, there is not much left
besides
 imagination. Other
down sides
Correct your spelling
downsides
show examples
 of
this
 topic would be that there are so many products which are the same that most of the time
people
 can not even decide
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
what would they really want.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenience
  • time-saving
  • wide selection
  • competitive prices
  • discounts
  • accessibility
  • global marketplace
  • availability
  • fraud
  • scams
  • lack of
  • physical interaction
  • personal experience
  • impersonal
  • customer service
  • delays
  • delivery
  • return process
What to do next:
Look at other essays: