IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least

#wealth #guaranty #happiness
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Many people believe that money is the key to happiness and each individual has the eager to earn it.
On the contrary
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, some feel that more wealth
also
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 causes problems in one's life. As in my opinion, I strongly believe that if a person has enough to fulfil his/her basic necessities like food, shelter and clothing
that is
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 worth to survive in today's era. There are various reasons for it.
Firstly
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, more fund causes more problems as we noticed that usually the wealthy person have more stress and he spends more time in thinking to earn more and more, which is useless.
Moreover
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, we have been noticed that the rich person has the friends with the benefits regardless of the few exceptions, who are there for him to use his cash and enjoying their life. The moment, he gets poor, everybody will leave him at his own, feels the sense of dissatisfaction.
Secondly
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, rich individual will try to build hi wall around him to protect himself and his wealth all the time. Usually, the big companies installed the hi-tech cameras and other security staff to safeguard their capital and property result in a feel of insecure from every other individual.
This
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 puts the negative impact on the individual's mindset that everybody is there to use him/her. In the nutshell, capital is important in anybody's life, but not more than a relationship between friends and families which is the base to live happily. Relationship is the real wealth and the mode of happiness for anybody.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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