IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Watching television is bad for children. To what extent do you agree?

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Introduction
In
this
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 techno-savvy era, the technological tools like
television
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, laptop, mobile phones are becoming the part and parcel of everyone's life.
However
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, the usage of
TV
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 will affect the children in a bad way and I strongly agree with that point of view.
This
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 essay will discuss how
this
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 could happen.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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 with, there are numerous shows telecast on the
Use synonyms
television including
Accept comma addition
television, including
 knowledgeable programmes and unimportant advertisements, which will affect the mindset of the kids. The folks might attract towards the bad channels by using
TV
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 set, which are not good for their knowledge.
For example
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, most of the shows contain adult scenes, which will provide wrong information to the folks at their young age, and they might use that thing in a bad way. So, there is a high risk for the safety and security of the children while watching
TV
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.
Body paragraph 2
Moreover
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, watching
television
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 in excess is not appropriate for the health of the kids. It will become the major reason behind certain types of illness issues.
For example
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, the brightness of the
TV
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 set screen is very harmful for the eyesight and if the folks using
television
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 for long period of time,
then
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 they might face the problems related to the difficulty in seeing, headache, darkness around the eyes and more. Overall, it is not a good phenomenon to use
television
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 on a daily basis for the kids.
Conclusion
To conclude,
television
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 always affects the children's abilities and thinking level.
This
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 essay discussed that how the
TV
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 will become a reason for health problems, and the chances for the lack of safety and security in the terms of the children. In my opinion, I am an absolutely agree with
this
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 phenomenon.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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