People were happier in previous generations compared to now. To what extent do you agree?

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While
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happiness is a broad topic with several definitions and changes for each individual
according to
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generation, I firmly believe that when people get older, they are happier than they are compared to the present era. Individuals earlier were more tend to form deeper and stronger connections both with their relatives and friends.
This
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was
also
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because of less use of technology. They did not have access to mobile phones, and the only way to get in touch with friends and family members was through face-to-face interaction. To give a more detailed example, they made it a priority to attend
such
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social events or family meetups to learn about each other's well-being.
In addition
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to
this
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approach, individuals' mood changes and
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
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are affected positively.
This
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scenario nowadays is not the way it was. Mostly, the new and next-generation spend most of their time on electronic devices and find excuses to skip social events.
This
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is because they can easily access their friends through social media.
Besides
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not only for communication but
also
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they can play games with online game platforms, so they tend to become anti-social.
While
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they even meet their social needs by playing with artificial intelligence, they do not participate in any additional social activities. In conclusion, having a strong family bond and spending time at social events gives individuals a break from their routine, and having regular social breaks elevates your mood and happiness in a better way.
While
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, with the developed world of technology, we forget to spend time with our families because of the stressful life conditions. In my opinion,
while
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people in older generations did face some problems, they lived happily, without stress about the drawbacks of the technology world.

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task achievement
Consider enhancing your examples with more detailed evidence or statistics to further support your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use linking words more effectively to improve the flow between your points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to elaborate more in the conclusion by summarizing key points more thoroughly.
content
The essay presents clear main ideas and arguments about happiness across generations.
structure
You have structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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