Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in an organised group activity in their free time. Others say that group is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves in their own opinion.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activity #time

Children are

live

Suggestion

living

in the stiff competitive era; Today, children has more

acthave

Suggestion

act have

, follow their passion their aims

already fix

Suggestion

have already fixed

, and they stick

Suggestion

one particular path. Apart from

this

, children's life becomes a rat race.

sometimes

Suggestion

Sometimes

live in competitive phases is beneficial for children or sometimes shows dark side effect.

Nonetheless

, some parents think that'

child

workforce society

Accept comma addition

workforce, society

, humility.'

Therefore

, encourage their

child

to taking

Suggestion

to take

part in the

organisation

or participate in social group

active

Suggestion

activities

in their free

time

. On one hand,

parents

Suggestion

parents'

expectation towards

child

has massive; only due to Parent force some

child

connect with social

organisation

for social activities group.

However

this

kind of

parents

Suggestion

parents'

behaviour sometimes shows positive as well as negative impact on their career full

stop

Accept comma addition

stop, for

for example

society has

plethora

Suggestion

a plethora

of activity like cultural professional maybe some children are fed up

from

Suggestion

with

this

kind of activity. Apparently,

children

Suggestion

child's

children's

interest may be reduced. On

other hand

Suggestion

the other hand

, to be part of social

organisation group

Accept comma addition

organisation, group

activities is

dream

Suggestion

dreaming

of some children. Because, they feel responsible, reverence towards society. That's why

children

Suggestion

children's

activity

particiactivelyparticipates

up in their leisure

time

. Without any educational disturbance

child

utilise t,

heir

of a female

her

time

for the

organisation

. Ian n conclusion, parents should not bother to the children to take a part in any

sial

anything regarded as making something unclean

soil

sale

sail

activities.

However

, parents should provide information about the

organisation

, or an e there their responsibility. Ultimately, children understand there is a possibility and obey the rules. It is inevitable to understand

child

mentally for parents. They should identify

child like

befitting a young child

childlike

and dislike. According to children strength parent, take

decision

Suggestion

a decision

Ltakesba

Suggestion

out

, not the least, parents are

first

teacher

fother

a male parent (also used as a term of address to your father)

father

their

child

. There for, only

Therefore teachers

Accept comma addition

Therefore, teachers

Suggestion

the

child

what children do in their leisure

time

Submitted by Priya Balge on Sat May 30 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in an organised group activity in their free time. Others say that group is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves in their own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all money they earn and should not pay any tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on sustainable living and reducing environmental impact. What are the challenges of adopting a sustainable lifestyle? What practical actions can individuals take to contribute to sustainability?

Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree?

Students from disadvantaged families and rural areas are finding it difficult to get a university education. Some people believe that universities should help them. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The three pie charts show the proportion of four kinds of vehicles used in the UK in 1996, 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the man features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.