IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

It is better for college students to live far away from home than live at home with their parents. Do you agree or disagree?

#college #students #home #parents
Starting to study at a university has been considered as a major milestone in people’s life because there are many differing changes that they have to be ready for. Particularly, some students have to be familiar with living by themselves
instead
 of continuing being with their families. In my opinion, that might be the competitive advantage for students to enter their own future. We cannot deny that there are two huge merits when students are supported with a decent accommodation by their beloved families.
Firstly
, it is obvious that they are able to apply their mind into studying without any concerns.
For example
, to have a good living environment requires students to spend an amount of time looking for a good rented room, considering the monthly fee as well as other financial burdens
such
 as electricity, water or phone bills. Speaking of
social aspect
Suggestion
the social aspect
, it is easier for the students living with families to be prevented from social evils. More importantly,
instead
 of being isolated when they get into trouble, they can rely on their trustworthy relationships which encourage and teach them right from wrong. Despite the above benefits of living at home, living by their own is strongly encouraged when they start a completely new chapter in life. Evidence shows that long-term experiences of living alone can help them to be more self-reliant and confident in
this
 modern society. The main reason is that the more problems they have to deal with, the more motivation and
ambition they
Accept comma addition
ambition, they
 obtain, which may build up their adaptable characteristics. One more thing is that living without the support from families asks them to budget their spending, or they could have some
savings
Suggestion
saved
 from their part-time jobs for later. In terms of social relations, the students living away from families gain more opportunities to be
get
Suggestion
getting
gotten
got
 used to other people when they live
at
Suggestion
in
 the same house
such
 as domes,
residents
Suggestion
resident
 hall or sharing apartments. These precious experiences can help them to be more open-minded and valuate the differences among people in the whole group.
Although
 students might concentrate to their schooling if they live with their family which has solid financial support, I do agree that students should spend their 4-year college to socialize with other people as roommates to broaden their horizons as well as collect some unforgettable memories during their carefree
students
Suggestion
student
students'
 days.
Submitted by Loiquach on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: