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Writing Samples
Band 6

Despise the advances made in agriculture many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this case? What can be done to solve this problem?

#advances #agriculture #people #world #case
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It is irrefutable that being a tremendous improvement in the irrigation sector, still manifold people are starving globally. Lack of proper distribution channel is responsible for
this
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 problem.
However
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, it can be solved by implementing certain rules that aid to deliver the food without any
further
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 interruption. One of the major obstacles is the diffusion flow of the grain is corrupted and is not maintained properly. To be more precise, there are multifarious countries that are blessed with a fertile land and grows innumerable crops annually,
such
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 as India, China, and the United states, but their marketing strategies are not well maintained,
for instance
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, the broker and agents charge a heavy amount to transport the harvest to the local market, no ration card has been made that shows the adequate quantity of the goods received.
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therefore
Suggestion
Therefore
, most of the cereal fails to reach to the people,
as a result
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, half of the population across the world are malnourished.
Additionally
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, one of the possible outcomes to eradicate
this
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 barrier is to impose stringent laws against
this
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 corruption. Simply stated, the government needs to modify the distribution flow of the food along with rigorous checks,
for instance
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, a legal committee can be set up to look after the records how much quantity of the grain is delivered on a monthly basis to which country, fair rates should be fixed for the buyer and the seller, and the frequent audit can be done to check the current situation of the market. To conclude, since the agriculture industry has enhanced a lot, but people all over the world are deprived of food due to improper channelisation.
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Hence to
Accept comma addition
Hence, to
 overcome
this
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 difficulty, the law and enforcement departments must apply the strict action against
this
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 negligence.
Submitted by Rashme on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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