IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

People are using a lot of online language translation apps. Do the benefits of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #language #translation #apps #outweigh
With the advent of the new modern schools, many individuals claim that discipline is
concerning
Suggestion
concerned
 teachers, while others believe that it is
gurdians'
something that provides direction or advice as to a decision or course of action
guidance
 matter. Personally, I hold the notion that it is a shared responsibility both of them should bear it, in order to impose the control over the children in the schools. On the one hand, tutors must ensure the application of disciplinary procedures during the education process, by supporting them to learn using interactive methods or even boosting their
awarness
having knowledge of
awareness
 about the
importance
Suggestion
important
 role of discipline in building their character.
For example
, many schools in Japan have begun to take the approach which
force
Suggestion
forces
 the disciplinary regulations
stricktly
restricted to something
strictly
 by organising lectures and sessions regularly to widen their knowledge about it.
moreover
in addition
Moreover
, the usage of the new methods of teaching, which lead by itself to make
japanese
of or relating to or characteristic of Japan or its people or their culture or language
Japanese
 students the best in the world.
On the other hand
, Parents in the home have a vital role in orienting children to adopt the approach of discipline by monitoring their behaviour and the academic performance of them.
For instance
, some
gurdians
a person who cares for persons or property
guardians
gardens
guidance
 tend to ask the teachers about the status of their children in the school, whether they proceed well in the education or not.
This
 will not only help in forming a clear picture about the
diciplinary
relating to discipline in behavior
disciplinary
 level they have, but
also
 help parents to take the correct actions. To conclude, what have been discussed above, we should balance between the role of both parents and teachers in the disciplinary issues in order to create a high quality generation which able to behave in a perfect manner to deal with the different situations.
Submitted by Abdelrahman khaled on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: