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Band 5

Some people feel that music should be taught in schools while others believe it is better to focus on the sciences. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #music #schools #focus #sciences
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Nowadays, education is an integral part of everybody's life.
However
, there are some arguments about
importance
Suggestion
the importance
 of each subject. On the
one
 hand, a
plethore
extreme excess
plethora
 of people
opine
Suggestion
opines
 that
music
 is crucial in
studying process
Suggestion
the studying process
. Without a doubt, that subject may possibly have
extremely positive impact
Suggestion
an extremely positive impact
 on future generations. With learning
music
, children will be more intelligent, because they will have general knowledge which
one
 is high-quality sound and which
one
 is useless,
as a result
, it may alleviate a quantity of future singer, who would produce unsatisfactory content.
For instance
, there was an article which
revealse
make visible
revealed
reveals e
reveals
 that adults who studied
music
 at school in
comparisone
the act of examining resemblances
comparison
 with those who did not, had higher the IQ level.
On the other hand
, there is a strong view that science is the most essential. Indeed, Physics, Chemistry, Biology and Math are
indispensible
not to be dispensed with; essential
indispensable
 during every child's education. A numerous of
usefull
being of use or service
useful
 skills may be developed with
help
Suggestion
the help
 of those subjects
such
 as logical thinking and solving problems
.
Accept space
.
Furthermore
, science is everywhere, it is connected with every aspect of
everbody's
Suggestion
everybody's
everybody
 life.
For example
, in
one
 popular TV show, a group of scientists showed how a car tire can be replaced with
help
Suggestion
the help
 of general laws of physics. They used minimum of equipment. Personally, I believe that it is important to study a wide range of subjects at school.
Consequently
, that will help children to understand what they are
pasionate
having or expressing strong emotions
passionate
 about and it will be
usefull
being of use or service
useful
 in future choice-making procedure about occupation.
As a result
, there will be more happy society. In conclusion,
music
 helps to have better taste and be more intelligent, whereas sciences may help to solve some every day issues.
Submitted by Людмила Репета on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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