IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

When so many people are starving to death in different parts of the world, do you think it is justifiable for any government to spend money on Space Exploration Projects? Give your views

#people #death #parts #world #government #money #space #exploration #projects
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
 advanced era, where every
country
Use synonyms
 is mad before the new exploration either in
space
Use synonyms
 or other in making their names they are forgetting to feed some of the basic needs of their countries like
hunger
Use synonyms
 poverty
etcetera
Suggestion
. So, I think the government should work on these platforms. In the
country
Use synonyms
 like India, which is now focusing on making its name in the
space
Use synonyms
 industry either in the moon mission or mars mission a huge amount of money is spent on these projects. According to the reports, 141 million US Dollar was spent on mission
chandrayaan
Suggestion
Chandrayaan
 2
.
Accept space
.
 If
this
Linking Words
 huge amount was spent on providing food
instead
Linking Words
 would have reduced the level of poverty. One should not forget that
lives
Suggestion
the lives
 of countrymen matter much and is above
all for
Accept comma addition
all, for
 a nation to be successful as real progress a
country
Use synonyms
 does is seen by well being of its people. According to global
hunger
Use synonyms
 index report of 2019
,
Accept space
,
India ranked 102 on the level of
hunger
Use synonyms
 with the rate of 30.3. If people will starve due to
hunger
Use synonyms
 who will make the machines for
space
Use synonyms
 explorations? Countrymen are the one on whom the whole
country
Use synonyms
 feels proud if these people will starve who will progress?So, one should feed these people
instead
Linking Words
 of making
space
Use synonyms
 exploration.
To conclu
Accept comma addition
conclude, I
conclude I
de i would like to state that the countrymen are above all and they are the pillars and we should work
for
definite article
the
this
thei
Submitted by neeraj on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: