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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions aimed of tourists. Others believe it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss on both sides and give your opinion.

#people #traditions #attractions #tourists
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Nowadays, cultural heritage is commonly utilized for
tourism
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 purposes. Some people may think it could destroy them, while others think these traditions are better maintained. I believe that properly using cultural tradition is beneficial for protecting them.
Firstly
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, developing cultural
tourism
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 is a means of making money from them.
Therefore
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, each authority has a budget to protect, maintain and popularize their cultural treasure. If there are more tourists attracted by traditional
culture
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, these traditions will be well-known and get rid of vanishing.
For example
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, in Korea, most ancient castles are open seven days a week for all tourists who come from different countries. The entrance tickets are even waived if they wear handbooks, which are traditional clothes of Korean men and women.
This
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 activity attracts more people in the world interested in Korea tradition cultures.
However
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, exhaustively utilizing these traditions for money making purposes seems harmful to them.
This
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 is the problem of changing the traditional value to adapt to modern interest. Many folk melodies mixed with modern electronic rhythms are performed to attract younger tourists. The traditional folk music is mostly diminished and replaced by another type of mixing music.
This
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 scenario is similar to other types of traditional
culture
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 when adapting is gradually changing and destroying traditional values.
Hence
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, to protect traditional
culture
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 requires more than developing
tourism
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 activities, but strict constraints and policies applied to the cultural money making process. In conclusion, I strongly believe that it is benefited to the traditional
culture
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 based upon the
tourism
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 industry.
However
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, proper constraints and regulations applied are necessary.
Submitted by Trinh Vuong on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Commercialization
  • Dilution of cultural traditions
  • Authenticity
  • Cultural heritage
  • Revenue
  • Financial support
  • Preservation
  • Promotion
  • Commodification of culture
  • Intrinsic value
  • Exposure
  • Global awareness
  • Respect and understanding
  • Economic gain
  • Local communities
  • Decision-making processes
  • Respectful portrayal
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