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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Many teenagers now have their own smart phone. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this and give your own opinion

#teenagers #phone
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Most
childerns
Suggestion
 now have their own mobile phones.
This
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 essay will argue that despite most
childerns
Suggestion
use
Use synonyms
to
Suggestion
of
 smartphones. Many teenagers spent on
time
Use synonyms
 own telephones which are mobile phones have becoming health problem
such
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 as mobile phones are bring different illnesses which are becoming
eyeache
(used of count nouns) every one considered individually
each
,
brainache
Suggestion
brainiac
.
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Therefore most
Accept comma addition
Therefore, most
 parents should pay attention for their
childrens
a young person of either sex
children
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becouse
for the reason that; on account of
because
 their
childrens
a young person of either sex
children
 do not do homework on
time
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. It is
influence
Suggestion
influenced
 on their knowledge.
Linking Words
Moreover childrens
Accept comma addition
Moreover, children
Moreover children
 almost do not read books
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becouse
for the reason that; on account of
because
, teenagers have connected with
internet
Use synonyms
 which is
interact
Suggestion
interacting
 with their spent much
time
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 for the
internet
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 news or online video games. I believe, it is
bad idea
Suggestion
a bad idea
.
On the other
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hand sometimes
Accept comma addition
hand, sometimes
 teenagers
use
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to
being one more than one
two
 mobile phones for their subject or do homework. Many students
use
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to
Suggestion
of
 the
internet
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 which is
get
Suggestion
getting
 information from the
internet
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. They
are think
Suggestion
think
have thought
are thinking
 about how can they easily do homework with the
internet
Use synonyms
.
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Moreover they
Accept comma addition
Moreover, they
use
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to
being one more than one
two
 mobile phones for reading books and download subject apps from the
internet
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
becouse
for the reason that; on account of
because
 students do not want to go to the courses. It might be students read various subject apps. It
is seems
Suggestion
seems
 quite comfort for their. In conclusion, most students
shouldn't spent
Suggestion
shouldn't spend
 much
time
Use synonyms
 for own smart phones
Use synonyms
becouse
for the reason that; on account of
because
 mobile phones always have misinform teenagers. Teenagers should
use
Use synonyms
 to own smartphones for specific
work-out
the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit
workout
workouts
 or lessons and their works.
Submitted by Shomurod on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • communication
  • access to information
  • safety and security
  • entertainment
  • educational opportunities
  • addiction
  • excessive screen time
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • distraction
  • lack of focus
  • privacy concerns
  • social disconnection
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • opinion
  • outweigh
  • limits
  • screen time
  • online safety
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