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Writing Samples
Band 5

People are living longer. Some people think that it causes big problems. Others, however, think the aging population has many advantages for business, government and for society in general. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #population #business #government #society
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People in
this
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 modern world are having a longer life expectancy, which opens questions as to whether
this
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 is advantageous or disadvantageous to society.
This
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 essay will discuss both sides of
this
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 argument and give my opinion at the end of the essay On the one hand, an ageing population increases pension costs and competition for jobs. An increase in the proportion of the elderly in the population puts greater pressure on the pension system as it will be harder to finance their retirement.
This
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 results in the growing burden on the Government.
On the other hand
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, the main advantage of people living longer is that there will be more volunteers in social work. The elderly in many countries contribute free labour to
community
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the community
 and government projects after retirement because they are usually financially comfortable and find pleasure in giving back to their communities and countries.
Furthermore
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, elderly people are a traditional knowledge museum. They can help pass on traditions and ways of life to younger generations, which is particularly advantageous in countries like Vietnam, where cultural values are becoming less and less significant to young people. In my view, it is true that there are several problems associated with an ageing population;
however
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, those problems only do a little damage to the development of society. I personally think when people live longer, society as a whole will be able to reap greater benefits.
Submitted by Ngọc Nguyễn on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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