Public celebration such as national day festival are held in most countries .these often quit expensive and some believe that government should spend money on more useful thing agree or disagree essay

#celebration #countries #believe #government #money

Nowadays the various

festival

Suggestion

festivals

and national

day

celebratef in throughout

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celebrated throughout

celebrated in throughout

the world

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which

Suggestion

Which

is quite expensive due to on

exobident level

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the exorbitant level

exorbitant level

expedient level

of celebrations

Accept space

some

Suggestion

Some

people believe that government should spend money to improve the infrastructure and health services. In

this

essay am going to illustrate both of views in substantial paragraphs

Accept space

before giving my perception. To commence with the national

day

and festivals

are belongs

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belongs

to our traditions

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values and cultures.The Diwali celebrated in all over the nation because people are strongly

connecting

Suggestion

connected

their sentiments with it.

secondly it

Accept comma addition

Secondly, it

Secondly it

is the vitally important to aware our new generation about history

Accept space

and sacrifice of our ancestors.

thus it

Accept comma addition

Thus, it

Thus it

is mandatory to recognize the

indipendent

Suggestion

independence

independent

Independence

day

among the youngsters and upcoming generation.

they

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They

should know about the historical sacrifices of freedom fighters

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eminent leaders who took a part in

freedom

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the freedom

of the nation.

apart

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Apart

from that

instead

of wasting money on extra

expences

amounts paid for goods and services that may be currently tax deductible (as opposed to capital expenditures)

expenses

authority can

constructed

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construct

museums and make a

movies

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movie

to awaking youth. On the flip side

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the various troubles which are hovering on the society

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for

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For

instance 'women safety"

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our renewable resources which are almost on the verge of extinction. The government should take

active intrest

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an active interest

active interest

active interests

active interested

in these areas.

further

Suggestion

Further

more the

environment

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environmental

confition

a state at a particular time

condition

is becoming a detrimental

day

Accept space

for

Suggestion

For

example the global warming has been increased

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ice caps melting rapidly

Accept space

consequently these

Accept comma addition

Consequently, these

Consequently these

are alarming a threat on

globally

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a global

global

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the

Suggestion

The

festival

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national days should be celebrated but they can reduce the

extravanges

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By the way of conclusion

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the both

statement

Suggestion

statements

have their own

peacularities

an odd or unusual characteristic

peculiarities

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pros and cons

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everything

Suggestion

Everything

can be possible to

maintained

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maintain

the limited budget.

Suggestion

also

prominent that allocate some money on other construction for enhancing the strength of

nation

Suggestion

the nation

a nation

nations

Accept space

Submitted by Jatinder Kaur on Tue Jul 07 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
51Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

280 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Public celebration such as national day festival are held in most countries .these often quit expensive and some believe that government should spend money on more useful thing agree or disagree essay

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled they say that the only way to increase recycling is for goverments to make it a legal requiremet.

We live in a worlds of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages the problems in terns of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent you agree

In many countries schools have severe problems with student behaviour. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

many high level of positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than fifty percent female. compnies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. to what extent do you agree or disagree?