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Band 6

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#university #education #job #hand #people #skills
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While
 some
people
 believe that the best way to have a fine job is through
a
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university
 education, others argue that it is more important to gain experience and develop soft
skills
.
This
 essay will discuss both perspectives,
along with
 presenting my opinion. On the one hand, completing college studies and having a
degree
 creates huge opportunities, especially in terms of one's career. One of the benefits of
this
 is individuals may get a job in big companies.
That is
 because most of the huge companies specifically look for a reliable
degree
 from a
university
 and they hire based on
this
.
For example
, Google corporation has a policy of only hiring
people
 with
university
 degrees.
Furthermore
, completing
university
 education presents
also
 another advantage which is the advantage of doing a master's
degree
. Doing a master's
degree
 is strictly necessary for specific jobs
such
 as scientists.
As a result
,
university
 studies may contribute to achieving the dreams of those who want to be scientists.
On the other hand
, gaining experience and developing soft
skills
,
such
 as leadership, may
also
 have great benefits, particularly in the business world. Most of these
skills
 aren't taught in
university
 and
as a result
, having these
skills
 can make
people
 rare.
For instance
, Steve Jobs, before founding the Apple company, had to drop out of college to learn leadership
skills
. A
further
 advantage is that it might lead to having great communication
skills
. Most of the individuals who don't study in
university
 go into the business world at
such
 a young age which helps them to improve their communication
skills
 and relationships with
people
. In conclusion, despite the benefits of not studying in college, I tend to believe that it is more beneficial to have a
degree
 and work with big companies for their career and
also
 for the ones who want to achieve their dreams.
Submitted by edzcls on

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coherence cohesion
You should ensure a clear logical structure throughout the essay, which includes a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Use cohesive devices to better link your ideas.
task achievement
While you have presented both sides of the argument and given your opinion, ensure that your ideas are expanded upon with clear explanations, and that your opinion is consistent and well-supported throughout the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • specialized training
  • networking
  • baseline requirement
  • financial burden
  • hands-on experience
  • practical skills
  • soft skills
  • dynamic job market
  • entrepreneur
  • formal education
  • portfolio
  • hybrid approach
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