New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time

Introduction: In modern society, the issue of using new technologies is a topic of controversy. Some people believe that children

are changed

Suggestion

have changed

change

in their free

time

by high-technologies.

Although

there are some benefits to

this

trend, I would argue that there are far more drawbacks. On the one hand, there are some benefits when children use new technologies.

First

of all, new technologies are more convenient for children to study with the help of computers or

smartphones

Suggestion

smart phones

This

is because there is much educational software available on these gadgets that support learning and encourage children to learn.

Furthermore

, using new technologies

allow

Suggestion

allows

children to entertain and

destress

psychological suffering

distress

after a hard day’s study. Just with networked

technology gadgets

Accept comma addition

technology, gadgets

, children can easily watch some funny videos. It will enable them to feel more comfortable and relax.

On the other hand

, despite the benefits mentioned above, I believe that these benefits are out weighted by the negatives.

Firstly

, when children spend their

time

using technology, they might develop some health problems.

For example

, children tend to sit too long to watch TV programs and look at the screen for a long

time

Thus

, It can make children suffer from eye problems

such

as short-sightedness.

Secondly

, using new technologies might negatively affect children’s study performance.

This

is because these children can be attracted to games, TV programs from

smartphones

Suggestion

smart phones

, TV, laptops, and tablets.

As a result

, they spend less

time

studying and get lower results. In conclusion, while I recognize some benefits of

this

trend, I still believe that these benefits are overshadowed by the drawbacks of the above-mentioned argument.

Submitted by Bich Thi on Wed Jul 08 2020

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

0123456789.0505

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Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

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Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

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Topic Vocabulary:

Digital literacy
Cyberbullying
Sedentary lifestyle
Inappropriate content
Self-learning
Screen time
Social inequality
Enhanced communication
Creative expression
Educational resources

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

It is better for companies to help their workers feel happy at work rather than put lots of pressure on them for the sake of profit. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some people think that they are the best people to teach school students the danger of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. To what extent do you agree? Use specific details and examples to explain your view.

Nowadays, people are using more consumer goods like refrigerator and washing machine. Does this have more advantages or disadvantages?

Innovation is often driven by the pursuit of profit and economic growth . However , some argue that it should prioritize addressing social and environmental issues . Discuss both sides and give your own opinion