IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible.others believe that some information is too valuable to be shared freely. discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #information
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
AT PRESENT, FRAUD CASES ARE AT ITS PEAK LEVEL THAN A DECADE AGO. CERTAIN FOLKS THINK THAT PEOPLE SHOULD SHARE THIER ALL THE INFORMATION WITH OTHERS. WHEREAS, THE REST OF THE INDIVIDUALS ARGUE THAT CERTAIN DETAILS ARE CRUCIAL THAT ONE DOES NOT SHARED IT.
THIS
Linking Words
 ESSAY WILL DISCUSS WHY
SUCH
Linking Words
 PEOPLE HAVE CERTAIN BELIEVE. I THINK IT ONE SHOULD THINK ABOUT THE NECESSOTY AND REQUIREMENT BEFORE SHARING ANY DETAILS TO SUSTAIN THE PRIVACY. ON THE ONE HAND, THE MAJOR BENEFIT OF SHARING ANY DETAIL IS THAT IT MAKES A WORK EFFORLESS AND EASY WITHOUT ANY INTERUPTION. BECAUSE, SOME TIME LACK OF INFORMATION MAY CAUSE DELAY IN SOME CHORES THAT ARE NEEDED TO BE FINISHED ON TIME.
AS A RESULT
Linking Words
, THEY MIGHT FACE DEVASTATING CIRCUMSTANCES. FOE INSTNACE, AS PER THE UK UNIVERSITY SURVEY, 80% OF THE WORK PLACES ARE FAST AND DO QUICK PROCESSING OF SOME LEGAL CHORES DUE TO THE AVAILABILITY OF ALL THE REQURED INFORMATION.
ON THE OTHER HAND
Linking Words
, THERE ARE SOME CRUCIAL INFORMATION THAT SHOULD NOT BE SHARED DUE TO THE INCREASE IN THE OFFENCE. WHEN WE DISCUSS OUR INFORMATION TO SOMEONE, THAT PERSON MIGHT TALE AN ADVANTAGE OF IT IN DOING FRAUD. THAN THE VICTIME WILL GET AND SUSPECIOUS CALLS AND THREATEN ABOUT THE MONEY.
THIS
Linking Words
 WOULD END UP IN OFFENCE.
FOR EXAMPLE
Linking Words
, ACCORDING TO THE USA CRIME BRANCH STUDIES, 70% OF THE PEOPLE ARE VICTIM IN ANY CRIME AND THE MAIN REASON BEHIND IT IS SHARING THE IMPORTANT DETAILS. IN CONCLUSION, BERFORE, DISCUSSING ANY INFORMATION, PERSON SHOULD COSIDERED WHETHER IT IS ESSENTICAL TO DO SO OR THERE ARE ANY ALTERNATIVES OF IT. THAN THE DETRIMENTAL IMPACT OF SHARING COULD BE DECLINE TO SOME EXTENT WHICH IS MORE VITAL.
Submitted by drsefalipatel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: