More and more people are suffering from health problems caused by a modern life style which cannot be treated with modern medicines. Some people think that a return to traditional medicine should be encouraged. To what extent do you agree?

Nowadays the modern life style has affected people's well being
dramatically
Suggestion
dramatic
dramatized
dramatised
and modern treatments are not helpful. It is argued that applying traditional treatments may be more efficient and should be replaced. I firmly believe that the latter idea can be more beneficial. Modern medical science is mostly based on chemistry and
therefore
the prescribed drugs are all made up of chemicals.
Although
these chemicals are tested and aimed
in
Suggestion
at
treating certain diseases, their side effects can lead to other illnesses.
For
example some
Accept comma addition
example, some
tablets which can stop acne, can cause
sever
intensely or extremely bad or unpleasant in degree or quality
severe
kidney problems.
Hence
the drawbacks that outweigh the advantages brings up
this
issue that they are not an appropriate treatment.
On the other hand
traditional treatments which are totally comprised of natural and organic elements are gaining more popularity.
Indeed not
Accept comma addition
Indeed, not
only are they tested over
years but
Accept comma addition
years, but
they
also
have less
harms
Suggestion
harm
to the body.
For
instance Chinese
Accept comma addition
instance, Chinese
are amongst the countries who are mostly dependent on traditional medicine and are regarded one of the
healtheiest
having or indicating good health in body or mind; free from infirmity or disease
healthiest
wealthiest
nations. So it can be concluded that encouraging
trafitional
consisting of or derived from tradition
traditional
treatment can solve the health problem due to modern
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
. To sum up
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
am convinced that to deal with the health problems stemming from the modern
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
, it is best to focus on using old medications
instead
of therapies based on modern chemical drugs.
Submitted by Fateme on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic approach
  • herbal remedies
  • acupuncture
  • integrative healthcare
  • modern lifestyle diseases
  • prevention
  • patient outcomes
  • sustainable health solutions
  • underlying causes
  • scientifically validated
  • healthcare systems
  • complementary therapies
  • balance and well-being
  • stress management
  • dietary habits
  • acceptance
  • resonate with
  • comprehensive care options
  • formal healthcare systems
  • personal beliefs
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