IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You stayed in a rental apartment during your trip last year and were generally satisfied with it. However, you encountered one issue. You are planning another trip and would like to rent the same apartment again. Write a letter to the owner. In your letter Express your interest in renting the apartment again. Mention the problem you faced during your last stay. Provide details about your upcoming trip and ask about the availability of the apartment.

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Dear Sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter regarding the availability of the same apartment that I lived in during my
last
Linking Words
 year's trip. I really loved your apartment as it has a great infrastructure and is located in a nice locality. I am keen on staying in your condominium again for the next few months.
Moreover
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, I
also
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 like the neighbours as they are friendly and helpful.
However
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, I faced a minor leakage issue in the flat
due to
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 the problem of drainage. I remember that the water came out from the bathtub because the drain was blocked and the tap was leaking too which made me a little uncomfortable.
Overall
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, I did not encounter any major trouble during my stay in the flat.
In addition
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, I am visiting your city next month for my office conference which is really important for my promotion.
This
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 meeting is with foreign delegates so I have to prepare for it prior, and I need
working
Change the verb form
to work
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 from home. It would be great if you
can
Wrong verb form
could
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 again rent me your apartment to stay. I am not sure if you have already rented your place to someone else. I am waiting for your positive response. Yours Faithfully, Harmeet
kaur
Change the capitalization
Kaur
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coherence and cohesion
Ensure to clearly divide different topics into separate paragraphs for improved readability.
task achievement
Review grammar and punctuation to eliminate minor errors.
task achievement
The letter is polite and uses appropriate language for a formal request.
coherence and cohesion
The closing of the letter is appropriately formal and respectful.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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