Today children are spending much more time watching TV compared to the past. Why do you think this happens? Is this a positive or a negative change?

#children #time #tv #change

In contemporary society, children opt for watching

This

trend can be the result of some notable reasons,

nevertheless

, I assert that it should be considered an essential step forward.

To begin

with, there are compelling reasons children are fond of

programs.

Firstly

programs are extremely alluring that can attract a plethora of children.

For example

, nobody can resist

to watch

Suggestion

watching

Toy's Story, which is an

astoneshing

surprising greatly

astonishing

movie containing scenes of violence and frightening.

On the contrary

, in the old days, these kinds of movies that are particularly for kids were rarely produced due to a lack of technology and creativity.

Secondly

, a television is almost available in every house across the world, so children take advantage of

this

situation and are not interested in leaving their homes.

On the other hand

, in the past, only wealthy people had the chance of having a television and most children went out to play with their peers. I personally think that the tendency of

watchig

the act of observing; taking a patient look

watching

by children is a welcome move. To elaborate, the educational role of

programs is undeniable. Regrading formal education, many programs

offer

Suggestion

offers

valuable information about academic subjects,

such

as physics and chemistry.

Likewise

, various channels like Discovery and National Geography expand students' insights on

nature

Suggestion

the nature

and critical thinking, which are a part of the hidden curriculum

that is

not

taught normally

Suggestion

normally taught

at school.

Moreover

can entertain children. Nowadays,

programs include a wide range of content from

shows, dancing and singing to sports competitions that can fairly satisfy all kids with different tastes. In summary, for plenty of reasons, children would prefer watching

, despite some drawbacks. From my point of view, its merits of

this

pattern outweigh the caveats;

thus

, it should be regarded as a positive change.

Submitted by Ali on Fri Jul 17 2020

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

screen time
sedentary lifestyle
educational content
entertainment
relaxation
physical activity
cultural exposure
mental health
visual skills
auditory skills
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