IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Television entertains, but can it also educate? Do you agree?

#television
In
argentina
a republic in southern South America; second largest country in South America
Argentina
 the
tv
 programs are not good at all, they only shows the private life of celebrities.
Although
 we do not have to generalize because there are really good programs on
tv
, like discovery. I strongly believe that the
tv
 can educate a lot if you find the right programs.
Firstly
 the
tv
 has a lot of
channel
Suggestion
channels
 where you can choose from, and almost every
channel
 has a different form to educate the viewers.
For example
,
nat
negation of a word or group of words
not
Nat
geo
change location; move, travel, or proceed, also metaphorically
go
 kids, which educate the children by cartoons.
In
addition you
Accept comma addition
addition, you
 can learn an extensive variety of things of the
world
, because every
channel
 educates you about different facts of the
world
.
In particular
, with History
channel
 you can learn a lot about the
world
 history.
On the other
hand we
Accept comma addition
hand, we
 do not
leave
inhabit or live in; be an inhabitant of
live
 in a
first
world
 country, and
much
Suggestion
many
 of the people that live in Argentina do not have a television, and less cable channels.Not having cable channels makes
learn
Suggestion
learning
 with
tv
 very difficult because the local transmission doesn't teach you anything. To sum up you always can learn from
tv
 if you watch the right programs.
Submitted by Alejandra Guaymás on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: