IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In the past 100 years, there are many inventions such as antibiotics, airplanes, and computers. What do you think is the most important invent for the past 100 years? Why?

It is certainly true that there has been a tremendous advancement in the field of science, technology, communication and others in the past century. A lot of useful and lifesaving inventions made their debut during the
last
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 100 years. Antibiotics,
for example
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, saved countless lives from deadly diseases;
air planes
Use the right word
aeroplanes
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 reduced travel
hour
Fix the agreement mistake
hours
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 and made the world one small village. We are living in
the
Correct article usage
an
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 age where technology is shaping our lives. We are surrounded by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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machines
around
Change preposition
apply
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us
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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for our needs. When we think about
technology
Punctuation problem
technology,
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 the first thing that comes to our mind is the image of a
computer
Use synonyms
.
According to
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 me, amongst all the inventions so far, the
computer
Use synonyms
 is the most vital invention of mankind, almost everybody is dependent on
computer
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 directly or indirectly
due to
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 its uses in different fields of work
such
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 as offices, hospitals, commercial places, schools, colleges, banks, hotels, educational institutions, shops, training institutes, military establishments, military and industries, etc. . With the advent of the
computer
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, we can accomplish a number of tasks with accuracy and precision within a short period of time
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 was not possible before.
For instance
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, tasks like accessing, compiling and analysing
database
Correct article usage
the database
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 of a large group of people
,
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apply
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takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
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 merely a few minutes. In the education
sector
Add a comma
sector,
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 a
computer
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 plays a very significant role in terms of saving paper and acquiring information from the internet
, students
Punctuation problem
. Students
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 can use computers for different projects and smart class learning.
Linking Words
Therefore
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Therefore,
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 computers are the greatest invention of all time because they reduce your time consumption on your activities, you can save your information and edit it anytime, and they let you do almost everything you need. Computers have become the most powerful tool ever created.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your opinion on why computers are the most important invention.
coherence and cohesion
Try to link your ideas more smoothly, using connecting words like 'firstly', 'next', and 'finally'.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples of how computers are used in various fields to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion about the importance of computers.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is organized into paragraphs, making it easier to read.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • revolutionized
  • fundamentally changed
  • transformed medicine
  • globalization
  • innovation
  • cultural exchange
  • access to information
  • instant communication
  • life expectancy
  • worldwide health
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