Young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults who commit crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #crimes #adults

In the contemporary world, a hugely-popular issue of juvenile delinquency has never failed to attract citizens’ attention. It is thought that immature humans who break the law should be punished as same as mature individuals

Accept space

From my perspective, I totally disagree with the statement.

Firstly

, we should not treat juvenile criminals and adult ones the same, because a majority of those children are not educated sufficiently or correctly in schools.

In other words

, in these days, schools

have focusing

Suggestion

have been focusing

are focusing

have focused

were focusing

are focussing

have focussed

extremely on academic knowledge,

such

as maths or physics without teaching students about morality and philosophy.

As a result

, those pupils are not able to distinguish whether what they do is right or wrong. Taking Vietnamese young student as an example for that, most of the minor crimes have been caused by the youths who do not receive a good education in schools.

Secondly

, the reason why we ought not to give a fair punishment between youngsters and adults who have anti-social

behaviors

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

is those juvenile criminals have been affected negatively by the social media,

such

as Facebook or

Youtube

Suggestion

YouTube

. In the modern life, an increasing number of young individuals use social networking websites and they are likely to be captivated by sensations stories and breaking news which relate to violence.

Consequently

, those people tend to imitate those illegal actions.

For instance

, young citizens will fight their classmates or even commit a murder if they watch or read excessively violent topics

Suggestion

the social media. In conclusion, there are two main reasons why juvenile criminals are mature ones should not be punished the same.

Submitted by Andy on Sun Aug 16 2020

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults who commit crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Childhood obesity is a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this and how can the problem be managed?

some people believe that children should study all subjects at school, while others think they should only study subjects they are good at or find interesting .discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?