«Some modern artists receive huge sums of money for the things they create, while others struggle to survive. Governments should take steps to resolve this unfair situation» To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people assess practicing
art
could be beneficial or
on the other hand
too risky leading to lack of money. The point is authorities do not provide enough support for the people who need a state sponsorship. I tend to believe there should be the
administration social
Accept comma addition
administration, social
cultural programs which will help artists to continue with their activity without financial fears. It is determined that an
art
sphere owns a tight competitive environment, there is a big challenge to become famous worldwide.
However
, several stars have a lot of advantages to be popular. Usually it may be reflected in their lifestyle. Famous people are seen as rich individuals who have a lot of wealth.
Additionally their
Accept comma addition
Additionally, their
career and an
artistic
Suggestion
arts
artist
promotion are encouraged not merely by throngs of fans. The fact is government ensures them with expensive awards or high-level prizes.
Nevertheless other
Accept comma addition
Nevertheless, other
equally talented persons are left with nothing. There is a huge gap between both types of gifted humans: someone who possesses popularity and someone who is unknown. The difference here is a state desire to support these people, who may
also
create valuable
art
pieces. Local authorities should establish the special government program which enables artists to continue with an
art
practicing. Precisely
this
act may give people a chance of developing their talents and creative self- expression. The
art
sphere is too risky for the people who do not want to work and seek excellence. There are always rivals taking better positions and are more popular;
however it
Accept comma addition
however, it
is not the sign to step back. The government should take care of people aiming to create, provide them financially at the
first
time of their attempts to become famous.
Submitted by nkh_99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: