IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

#people #advertisements #products #lives
One
 of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is a colossal upsurge in the number of people believing that advertisements foster us to purchase the things which are not required;
however
, others consider that advertisements help us to know more about the new product launched in the market. There is a widespread worry that
this
 will leads to a myriad of concerns in
one
's life which will be elaborated in upcoming paragraphs. There are a number of arguments in favour of my stance. The most preponderant
one
 is that advertisement not only contributes to increasing the economy
,
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 but
also
 lead to numerous other benefits in various fields. Thanks to the wide range of advantages it offers, not only can
one
 benefits more when it comes to being effective, but they can
also
 enhance the productivity and quality of their lives, with much ease, efficacy, and convenience.
For instance
, social media is a great source of advertisement. Whenever
,
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 any electronic product comes in the market, we can able to know more about their features, prices and comparison with existing
one
's. Needless to say, all these merits stand
one
 in good stead as far as augmenting their chances of prosperity and excellence is concerned. Another pivotal aspect of the aforementioned proposition is that it is only likely to help
one
 thrive and excel in varied areas.
Besides
, only when
one
 follows
such
 as system, can they broaden their horizons,
thus
 learning
such
 essential attributes as responsibility, dedication, and perseverance. To exemplify it, by purchasing unnecessary things can burn a hole in a pocket. Sometimes, people can suffer from huge debts and credit card bills.
Hence
, it is apparent why many are against buy advertised stuff. In the view of the arguments outlined above,
one
 can conclude that the benefits of advertisement are indeed too great to ignore.
Moreover
, advertisements may improve our lives, but, we must be aware of a shopaholic.
Submitted by Navpreet Kaur on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • persuade
  • manipulative
  • unnecessary
  • excessive
  • artificial needs
  • desires
  • consumers
  • oversaturation
  • impulse buying
  • financial problems
  • inform
  • educate
  • features
  • benefits
  • innovations
  • raise awareness
  • social issues
  • positive behavior
  • enrich
  • well-being
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