IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people believe that students should be taught international news as a subject at school. Others feel that this would be a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #students #news #school #waste #time
There has been a hot debate on whether international affairs should be included in our education. Some feel that it is unnecessary, while others claim they are valuable knowledge for our adolescents.
This
 essay will discuss both sides’ viewpoint and argue that international news should be delivered in classes but with less emphasis as other subjects. People against
such
 proposals as they feel that reading news is
time wasting
Add a hyphen
time-wasting
show examples
. Global affairs as a new subject
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 would add more pressure to our kids, who already have a hectic study schedule. Not to mention that they seem unrelated to us. Parents may prefer prioritizing practical skills,
for instance
, language, mathematics and science, as they are being viewed
Verify preposition usage
as
show examples
more important to the personal growth of teenagers and helpful in getting a good job.
However
, it is beneficial for our younger generations to know what is happening to the world. The society we are living in is more globalized than ever, and things happening far away may have substantial impacts on us. Take the global economy as an example, the plummet of a local stock market would cause domino effects to other economies, causing recessions across the globe.
Therefore
, students could gain more insights
to
Verify preposition usage
into
show examples
 the civilization we are situated today. As far as I am concerned, international affairs should be delivered in school time, so that our youngsters are more equipped to face our globalized society. But there should not be exams so that students could better focus on the learning of other academic subjects.
Submitted by funder5torm710 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: