IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

a friend of yours is a fitness instructor. you would like some advice about how to improve your own fitness. write a letter to your friend. in your letter - describe what you do now to keep fit. - explain why you want to improve your fitness. - ask some questions about how to improve your fitness

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Dear Akash, Hope you are well, It has been a long time since we
last
Linking Words
 spoke, The reason for
this
Linking Words
 letter is to ask for some advice from you. I saw on LinkedIn that you are now a certified
fitness
Use synonyms
 trainer. I have started my
fitness
Use synonyms
 journey recently and I try my best to keep myself in shape, I do a four-day spilt of weight lifting and cardio, but I struggle to maintain a balanced diet. I really want to improve my
fitness
Use synonyms
 and I feel like my current routine is just not that efficient. Since I have a busy schedule I want to find an efficient workout plan that fits into my schedule without getting overwhelmed. Could you recommend a workout plan to gain muscle and
also
Linking Words
 a diet plan that I can adhere to in order to make positive progress, I wish I had started my
fitness
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 journey a little sooner but better late than never. Looking forward to your reply, Appreciate your help, Sincerely, Krushang Patel.

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task achievement
Consider adding a bit more detail about your current fitness routine, such as how long you spend on weight lifting or cardio, or specific exercises you enjoy. This can provide a clearer picture for your friend.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that you properly separate your ideas into distinct paragraphs to enhance clarity. For example, one paragraph could focus on your current routine, while another can discuss your goals and questions.
tone
The letter has a friendly tone that is appropriate for writing to a friend, making it warm and inviting.
task achievement
You effectively communicated your current fitness routine and your desire to improve, which is crucial for a response from your friend.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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