IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what are the possible solutions?

#internet #information
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The chart illustrates different types of
music
Use synonyms
 albums purchased in
U
Correct article usage
the
show examples
K by different gender and
age
Use synonyms
 groups. Overall, people from 25 to 34 years of
age
Use synonyms
 bought
pop
Use synonyms
music
Use synonyms
 albums the most whereas more than 45 years of old purchased the least.
Also
Linking Words
Add a comma
,
show examples
male listeners of
pop
Use synonyms
music
Use synonyms
 were more than their female counterparts. Categorically, among men and women, almost 28 % of men bought
pop
Use synonyms
music
Use synonyms
 in Britain
where as
Correct your spelling
whereas
show examples
 only 18 % of women bought the same. Moving on to the other part, nearly 30% of people between 16 to 24
age
Use synonyms
 group bought
pop
Use synonyms
music
Use synonyms
 albums and
that is
Linking Words
 only around 2% less for 25-34
age
Use synonyms
 group who
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
also
Linking Words
 happened to be the highest number of buyers. Approximately 25% of people between 35 to 44
age
Use synonyms
 group bought the
pop
Use synonyms
music
Use synonyms
 albums,
however
Linking Words
, only 10% of people more than 45 years old bought the same and that was the lowest among all
age
Use synonyms
 groups and all gender.
Submitted by arkosingh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybersecurity
  • phishing
  • identity theft
  • misinformation
  • fake news
  • social isolation
  • internet addiction
  • data privacy
  • digital literacy
  • regulations
  • awareness programs
  • manipulate
  • proliferation
  • consent
  • escalated
What to do next:
Look at other essays: