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Band 7

The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care System in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the Best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #strain #health #care #system #effort #education #lessons #school #curriculum
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As the world moves towards a more sedantary lifestyle, the number of overweight people continue to rise. The cause of obesity, in most individuals, can be attributed to
two
Use synonyms
 very basic habits: unfiltered eating and lack of exercise. The human race in today's day and age is well equipped to turn both these habits giving rise to
this
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 feable looking but in reality a big monster that puts strain on the healtcare system with no plan in sight to control
this
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 monster. Eating
right
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 is a very simple yet a very effective tool an individual can posses in order to maintain one's health.
For example
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, keepling a tab on what we are eating and how much we are eating and comparing it to what and how much actually should we be eating can help us form a
right
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 diet. A
right
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 diet can make us more active, give us more energy and most importantly can keep us fit and fine. The other important factor i.e exercise needs more
education
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 than the
first
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 one. Exercise when done correctly can help our body function like a well oiled machine. It can provide us with strength, better coordination, better movement and can help us keep in shape.
However
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, if exercise is done incorrectly, it can lead to inguries which can well be long term in nature.
Hence
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, it makes sense for an individual to have a school curriculum which is focused on physical
education
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.
This
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 will not only help avoid inguries but
also
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 form a habit in individuls
right
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 from their tender age, killing
two
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 birds in a stone. All in all, the problem of overweighing requires fighting on
two
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 fronts, i.e
Right
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 eating and
Right
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 exercising.
Hence
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, it becomes highly important to construct an
education
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 system with physical
education
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 as its important pillar. It does not
however
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 stop there, as we cannot make do with adding only of of the
two
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 tools and
therefore
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 along with physical
education
Use synonyms
 a more in-dept understanding of food and eating habits is
also
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 needed to be included in the school curriculum
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity rates
  • health care system
  • physical education
  • instill
  • long term
  • raise awareness
  • healthier lifestyle choices
  • nutritional education
  • active transport
  • quality of instruction
  • facilities and equipment
  • diet control initiatives
  • community sports programs
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