Schools should teach children some academic subjects which will be beneficial to their future careers. Therefore, other subjects such as music and sports are not important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
There has been a common assumption that young
people
need to have to good academic background to be considered successful. Therefore
, some people
believe that music
class and P.E should remove
from the curriculum so that totally on teaching academic subjects. I disagree with Wrong verb form
be removed
this
opinion as both music
lesson
and physical education are essential for Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
students
in terms of daily life and future career
. Listening to Fix the agreement mistake
careers
song
and playing musical instruments can be beneficial for Fix the agreement mistake
songs
people
's health, that
can lighten one's mood and alleviate boredom. Attending a concert or streaming melody online is a leisure activity that can help them forget their stressful work or study for a Correct pronoun usage
it
while
, listening to light song
can reduce anxiety and enhance sleep quality. Fix the agreement mistake
songs
Additionally
, rock shows differences between cultures, and encouraging people
to play music
can preserve the diversity of musical styles. Musical traditions differ from region to region, and there are substantial differences in musical instruments, rhythms, genres, beats, and lyrics. While
western
Capitalize word
Western
music
has gained in popularity throughout the world with pop music
, rock music
and blues heard everywhere, some traditional varieties of music
are still alive in some parts of the world. In China, for example
, some folk songs still have their fan base and there are musicians who attempt to keep these traditions alive. Moreover
, the music
industry can be a driver of economic growth. More people
choose to go to the concert and pay an exorbitant amount for watching
the Change preposition
to watch
music
shows of their favourite musicians. Additionally
, singers and bands sell albums to make a huge profit or mementoes. For these reasons, the creative industry can create numerous jobs supporting musical performances and TV shows of talented musicians. In this
sense, it can become a new engine of the economy. Physical Education helps students
contributes
to self -development, and shape. Since social competition is fierce, young children have all Correct subject-verb agreement
contribute
reasons
to achieve in-depth and comprehensive development in competitiveness. Physical exercises Correct article usage
the reasons
such
as playing basketball or playing football involve multiple team activity
which emphasized heavily on teamwork communication skills, coordination ability, and organization capacity. Fix the agreement mistake
activities
Therefore
, not only can help
tone and body and firm up muscles but Wrong verb form
helps
also
can help
them Wrong verb form
helps
to
Change preposition
apply
how
Rephrase
apply
to
become Fix the infinitive
apply
an
excellent team member and master soft skills. Whenever conflicts happen in workplaces or other situations, Correct article usage
apply
people
with team sprites
and soft skills which is befitting for their future job. Having PE or Correct your spelling
spirit
music
class，by occupying spare time constructively， makes students
contented, with no time for boredom. To sum up
, It can't be denied that the young generation is under pressure to be successful today, in fact, they can also
be successful in particle jobs like singers and music
teachers, etc. Introducing music
and PE class
into the school curriculum could，to some extent， assist Fix the agreement mistake
classes
students
in realizing overall
development and add spice to their dull routine of everyday life.Submitted by 1339232976 on
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion