IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

It is often said that government spend too much money on projects to protect wildlife, while there are others problems that are more important? Do you agree or disagree?

#government #money #projects #wildlife
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In the present scenario, the deforestation and animals abused and killed for their skins is increasing immensely.
Consequently
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, the regime spends a plethora of money on projects to save endangered species . Whereas, some hold the idea that there are other significant issues
such
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 as health, education, depletion of natural resources are more important .
However
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, the protection of wildlife has become a frequent subject of debate with strong arguments on agreement or disagreement. I accord myself partially to
this
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 assertion. To open the deliberation, human activities
such
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 as Urbanization, deforestation are getting perilous for natural habitats and wild animals. They are cutting the trees to make homes and hotels, using their skins to make leather goods, throwing disposal and garbages in rives and seas.
This
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 irresponsible behaviour of people put animals lives in danger. Mostly industries drop their waste materials in the sea and that contaminated water has been drinking by water inhabitants.
Therefore
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, they are dying.
As a result
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, the authorities are taking strict actions against them and spending a huge amount to save the verge of extinction and making the guidelines regarding the conservation of animals.
For Instance
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, state officials have made wildlife management agencies who survey and collect all the information about their number and growth. They are protecting them from pollution and natural hazards and put restrictions on export and import of animal products and severe punishment to be given to those who indulge In
such
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 kind of offence. Thereupon,
such
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 initiatives have been taken by state officials to protect the flora and fauna. Despite the disappear of habitats is concerned, there are other problems which are occurring worldwide should not be neglected
such
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 as healthcare awareness, child labour, education, crime, terrorism, poverty. These are the utmost important issues raising day by day. The regime should equally concentrate spend the budget on these problems. They should try to control it or prevent it from pervasion. Human lives are as equally important as animals. The public organisations should start a medical awareness campaign and invest enormously in healthcare sectors. Eventually, no one should get deprived of getting medical treatment.
Moreover
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, cancer and Human immunodeficiency virus commons are known as HIV spreading globally and need immediate attention. To exemplify, the national AIDS Control Organisation
also
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 named as Naco is helping AIDS patients. Public officials should assign the budget to prevent the non-curable diseases. They should donate a tremendous amount to Naco by dint of
this
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, they can create an awareness and educate the masses especially illiterate and who lives in remote areas. By virtue of
this
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, these are
also
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 alarming issues and should need emergence actions physically and monetary. To recapitulate, Undoubtedly, it is necessary to conserve the wildlife by spending money on the preventive projects Simultaneously, other principle issues relating to mankind needs equal attention as well as funds. Apparently, budget is concerned it should be equally distributed by ministries to look after all the problems which need urgent attention.
Submitted by Priyanka Manhas on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Wildlife conservation
  • Biodiversity
  • Ecosystem
  • Human welfare
  • Poverty alleviation
  • Resource allocation
  • Cost-benefit analysis
  • Non-governmental organizations (NGOs)
  • Ecotourism
  • Sustainable development
  • Preservation
  • Endangered species
  • Habitat destruction
  • Climate change
  • Environmental stewardship
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