Along with economic development, the environment of the world is being seriously polluted. What economic activities can cause harm to the environment? What can be done to prevent this?
The growth of the economy these days has resulted in the level of pollution becoming worse.
This
is mainly caused by human activities in industrialisation and energy
production. However
, there are anumber
of solutions that should be implemented in order to avoid Correct your spelling
a number
this
issue such
as implementing strict regulations and protocols and promoting renewable energy
sources.
Firstly
, one of the main causes of a polluted world is that the number of factories has increased sharply throughout the years which has expanded the scale of production. To illustrate, a ton of industrial waste and dust were produced every day and disposed of to water sources without a careful treatment system due to
cost reasons. As a result
, the water environment and the habitat are damaged and destroyed. Another factor is the high usage of energy
in society daily particularly, fuels and electricity. For instance
, transportation often requires fossil fuels. Not only it
cause harmful air pollution but Add a missing verb
did it
also
led to the extinction of sea creatures when oil spilled out of ships.
On the other hand
, preventative measures could be done by the Government’s controls on industry policies. The authorities should strictly monitor the process and disposal of factory production to minimize detrimental effects on nature. Apart from that, In order to fulfil the public’s demand for energy
, the Government should introduce people to eco-friendly energy
. For example
, scientists nowadays have invented solar panels to replace electricity.
To sum up
, industry activities and high energy
consumption could possibly lead to poor air quality. In spite of that, particular terms and conditions and new environmentally friendly innovations are the key to this
problemSubmitted by dharyuschen12 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position and provides an answer to both questions. However, it could improve by including more specific examples to support its points. Try to illustrate with precise data or case studies where these issues have occurred and what the exact results were.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a logical sequence of ideas and paragraphs are organized, but transitions between ideas could be smoother. Work on using a wider range of cohesive devices and ensure paragraphs flow seamlessly into one another.
lexical resource
The essay uses a range of vocabulary, but to achieve a higher mark, try using a wider variety of complex structures and pay attention to collocations. Include terminology specific to the topic of environmental and economic issues.
grammatical range accuracy
While the essay shows a mix of simple and complex grammatical forms, there are occasional errors and a tendency to use simpler structures. Practice using a wider variety of complex grammatical structures and check for grammatical accuracy to improve your score.