Some people believe that our happiness depends on how much money we have. Others say that money cannot buy happiness. Do you think that having money is the key to happiness, or are there more important factors?

Nowadays, many believe that only the source of
one
's happiness is how much
money
they have, while
other
Replace the word
others
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believes
Change the verb form
believe
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there are more important things in
life
like family bonds and internal happiness. In my opinion, earning
money
should not be the ultimate goal in
one
's
life
, there are many essential factors like spending time with family, being happy in
life
and finding inner peace.
This
essay will opine my opinions with relative illustrations.
Money
seems to be
u
Add an article
the
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ltimate goals in many people's
life
. Their priority in
life
is to just earn
money
to the point that they comprise their moral compass.
For example
, In the United States, a guy who invented a drug for Aids patient, once the medicine got popularized and showed tremendous results in slowing down the disease, he hiked up the price by 110% to earn more
money
.
Although
, what he did was not wrong but ethically what he did was completely unacceptable. He was so blinded by the greed that he did not take care of the poor patients whoever in desperate need. In my opinion, The most factor in
one
's
life
is to attain inner peace and
a
Remove the article
apply
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happy
life
. These are two things that
money
cannot buys, no matter how rich we are, we can feel financially stable and happy for while but in a long run, it cannot compensate the feeling of social inclusion, love of family and friends.
For instance
, you can buy all the materialistic things in
life
but we can not buy genuine affection and respect for our social group. Love and respect are something that's needed to earn
similarly
like
money
.
Secondly
, the family bond is very important. A person without his family and friends can be the most lonely and depressed human being.
For example
, a person working around the clock to provide for his family not realizing that he is missing out so many things in his
life
like seeing his kids grow up, missing out on their major moments in
life
. To conclude, though
money
is important to live a sustainable
life
, it cannot guarantee the tranquillity in
one
's
life
.
This
can only be achieved by having a good relationship with their peers.
Submitted by rumaishauzair on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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