IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

#music #world #country
Various types of
music
 have been made increasingly worldwide and accessible in recent years. It is an undeniable fact that
music
 is virtually indispensable to our lives for a number of reasons.
However
, whether it is traditional or international, both
music
 genres/kinds are strongly believed to play certain integral parts in today society. The role of
music
 in human lives is comparatively direct and pivotal.
Firstly
, it is completely clear that
music
 prevents negative and unwanted feelings in many aspects of life.
For example
, those who often get strained or troubled at work might usually use
music
 to help them ease their minds.
Secondly
,
music
 plays a vital and huge part in terms of festivals, events, and performances. Without
music
, a show could be considered extremely unfulfilled and dried due to the lack of sounds and symphonies.
Therefore
,
music
 can be concluded to have giant impacts on the general public.
For example
,
music
 has connected people all around the world as a sign of unity. The One Love Manchester concert by Ariana Grande in collaboration with a number of A-list stars has shown an unprecedented power of
music
 in healing and empowering people to stand strong after the tragic terrorist attack in Manchester.
Nevertheless
, traditional and international
music
 has recently been compared and judged as to which more valuable/effectual/important.
Although
 both
music
 types are preferred and listened to the same extent, each one shares different characters and styles. The country type is considered to be more conventional and usually played in traditional or local shows and events. Yet, absorbing international
music
 can help people integrate and become more updated to friends living in other parts of the globe. In conclusion, the fact that
music
 is growing more and more favoured is, by all means, a positive development because of its practical benefits.
Also
, it is convinced that traditional and international
music
 to some extent completes each other.
Submitted by Trinh Vuong on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional release
  • cultural significance
  • globalization
  • cultural exchange
  • technology
  • preservation
  • cultural heritage
  • social cohesion
  • expression
  • consumption
  • production
  • traditional music
  • international music
  • diversity
  • identity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: