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Band 6

The internet isolates us and encourages people not to socialise. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#internet #people #socialise
Since the
internet
 was created, it has brought some advantages and
disadvsantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
 to society. A common opinion is that the
internet
 has separated us and foster people not to
socialise
. I completely agree with
this
 view and I will explain the reasons why. To some extent,
Correct the word
the
show examples
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
internet
 is seen as a tool that actually
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
 us more opportunities to interact. There are a lot of social media' platforms on the
internet
, in
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
Add a comma
,
show examples
we can interact with people and make some new friends. Before, there were few ways to make friends, whereas now, the
internet
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
 us
Verify preposition usage
with
show examples
many opportunities to meet new friends, by social media
for instance
.
Moreover
, when there is a pandemic going on, the
internet
 has shown to be the foremost and only tool we have available to
socialise
 and communicate with relatives and friends. The
internet
 has had a negative impact
among
Verify preposition usage
on
show examples
several generations.
For example
, the
milennials
Correct your spelling
millennials
millennial
 prefer to stay at home watching movies on the
internet
 rather than going out to
socialise
 with friends.
Furthermore
, if they go out with friends, they spend the whole time
focus
Change the form of the verb
focusing
show examples
 on
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
social media
instead
 of interacting with those surrounding them. When it comes to younger generations, like kids, they are likely to get obsessed with videogames, getting isolated from the external world. A recent study
in
Verify preposition usage
at
show examples
 the Melbourne university has shown that in 2019, kids spent more time playing
in
Change the preposition
on
show examples
 the
internet
 than socialising with
f
Add an article
a
show examples
riend and with their family. To conclude,
although
 the
internet
 has provided us with a new way to communicate and
socialise
, it can
also
 make us apart. To me, the
internet
 has changed the way we communicate and in some cases has encouraged us not to
socialise
. In the future, I believe the
internet
 will play an
imporrtant
Correct your spelling
important
 role in society either to unite or separate people.
Submitted by juansebastian-t on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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