The increased world demand for oil and gas has made it necessary for locating these sources in remote and untouched natural areas. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of damaging of these natural areas?

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Nowadays, in our contemporary societies, the need for oil and gas has become increasingly significant. Some believe that it could be beneficial to search these precious natural resources by drilling in backward areas.
this
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essay will explain the benefits and drawbacks of drilling and provide a logical conclusion Let’s begin by looking at the advantages of drilling. One of the main positives is that it could be helpful to lower fuel
prices
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. It goes without saying that if there is more drilling, there will be more supplies. What I mean by
this
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is that
people
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will ultimately enjoy more gasoline at lower
prices
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. Another advantage of
this
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phenomenon is that it would lower the
prices
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of basic amenities of life. When fuel
prices
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go up,
then
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it affects the
prices
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of everything
such
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as food and clothes because everything comes from
long
Correct article usage
a long
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distance and that’s transportation. There is ample evidence from
this
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example
suggest
Fix the infinitive
to suggest
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that fuel
prices
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play a pivotal role in our daily life.
Secondly
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, the process of drilling needs
people
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and equipment and
this
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would be the reason to create more jobs.
For instance
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, the town of Saskatchewan was alien because of cold weather. But since
then
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,
the
Change preposition
with the
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discovery of oil and gas, the demand for
people
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has been increasingly growing.
However
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, drilling
also
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has certain disadvantages. First of all,
this
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will increase air pollution.
People
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used heavy machinery for drilling
purpose
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purposes
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. These types of machinery emit harmful gases, which pollute our environment and eventually make
people
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sick.
In addition
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to that, drilling often disrupts the ecological environment of these particular areas by the use of
such
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powerful machinery. When
individual
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individuals
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use
this
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equipment, the living habitat
suffered
Wrong verb form
suffers
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a lot and moved to other parts of the world.
To sum up
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,
Correct word choice
apply
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although
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, drilling has certain disadvantages like air pollution and
disrupts
Wrong verb form
disruption of
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the ecological environment. It has an extremely positive impact on the growth of any country. I believe that these benefits of drilling outweigh its drawbacks

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Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction is a bit vague and lacks a clear thesis statement. It is important to clearly present your position on the issue in the introduction.
Task Achievement
You have addressed the task to a certain extent, but it is important to provide a more balanced view of the advantages and disadvantages of drilling in natural areas. You have mainly focused on the advantages and neglected some key disadvantages.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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