Recent technological developments have greatly changed our ways of life in a positive way. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is common for us to use recent technological devices and services
such
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as smartphones and the
internet
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Internet
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. Some argue that the
development
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of technology has enormous positive changes in human
lives
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. I completely agree with
this
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view because our
lives
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have become convenient and safe.
Firstly
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, new technological
development
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has positively changed
people
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’s
lives
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since their
lives
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are more convenient than before. Thanks to the invention of communication devices, they can keep in touch with others anytime.
For instance
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, it is easy to meet friends or family outside,
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people
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and people
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sending
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send
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text messages to notify others
that
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apply
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where they are now. In the past, individuals needed to wait for someone at a certain place which was discussed beforehand.
Furthermore
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, using social media,
people
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can make
a
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apply
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phone
call
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calls
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to friends who live in foreign countries without additional charge.
Thus
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,
people
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’s
lives
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have become more useful.
Secondly
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,
people
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also
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have benefited from up-to-date technology
development
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because the level of safety has increased. Nowadays,
people
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can live in accommodation which has a great security system.
For example
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, I am living in a condominium, which requires
press
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pressing
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a cord number to enter the building and
therefore
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only residents can get inside.
In addition
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, it
also
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installs security cameras in the entrance and elevators in case accidents happen. Because of these devices, residents can feel a sense of safety all the time. In conclusion, I totally agree with the opinion that
people
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have received benefits from the latest
technology
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technological
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development
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developments
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in their
lives
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since these technologies bring
people
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convenience and safety.

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your position, but it could be strengthened by outlining the main points you will discuss in the essay.
task achievement
Make sure to clarify your examples a bit more; they should illustrate your point in a more concise manner. For instance, clearly delineate how convenience was lacking before technology.
coherence and cohesion
Consider using more linking words to enhance the flow of your ideas from one sentence to the next, which can improve coherence.
task achievement
Ensure that you address the counterargument. Acknowledging an opposing view can make your essay more robust and show critical thinking.
task achievement
Your essay successfully maintains a clear viewpoint throughout, which is important for task achievement.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples that relate to the main points of convenience and safety, which enhances the overall argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • advancements
  • connectivity
  • interconnected
  • revolutionized
  • diagnostics
  • telemedicine
  • e-commerce
  • digital payment systems
  • convenience
  • accessibility
  • enhanced
  • online learning platforms
  • flexible learning
  • automation
  • safety
  • energy efficiency
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