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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays children have too much freedom,some people say.To what extent do you agree or disagree.Give your opinion with examples.

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Some people adhere to the view that children these days are granted excessive
freedom
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. I completely agree with
this
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 notion, because I believe that children with overmuch independence tend to be abusive and disrespectful. On the contrary, with less privilege, a disciplined and well-guided individual can be developed.
To begin
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 with, several individuals think that a vast amount of 
freedom
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 can nourish a child's self-sufficiency, confidence and social skills. They feel that through autonomy, he can have the chance to make his own decision and power during the course of his life. 
Moreover
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, they assume he can 
also
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 navigate his social atmosphere, and be educated and experienced in handling conflicts, without excessive dependence in the family.
Conversely
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, without constant supervision, profound self-determination can increase life risks and the possibility of a child/teen running against the law. 
Moreover
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, if a teenager exercised more privilege, he would be more prone to stranger abductions, drownings and bullying. 
Additionally
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, he might end up being spoiled and obnoxious. As a result, a great deal of discipline and adjustment would be necessary once he entered school. It is where he would be confronted with the reality that he cannot possess everything in his own way. Whence, his behaviour should be restrained to consider others as well. In my experience, my brother, having been used to enjoy enormous autonomy during his childhood, ended up breaking rules in school. 
However
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, after entering an academic institution which practices rigid guidelines, he ultimately transformed into a well-mannered and disciplined person. In conclusion, I believe that extreme
freedom
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 without structure and guidelines during the formative years of a child is preposterous. 
Hence
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, prohibiting him to gain absolute
freedom
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 represent a significant portion of the parental role.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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