Today some young people say that their mobile phones are the most important thing they own .Do you think that the popularity of mobile phones is a good or a bad thing?

#people #phones #popularity

At present,few teenagers are considering their mobile phones the crucial thing they have.I reckon negative things behind the popularity of cellphones outweigh its few bright

side

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sides

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Firstly

,adults are using digital phones and gadgets without considering the value of their useful time towards their study.It means,they are degrading themselves on educational activities which is more important than other things.

Also

,watching on the screen for long hours and staying at

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the

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same place will affect the vision as well as the physical fitness of

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the

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ser.We can notice many young age people hanging on mobile and playing games over there rather spending their quality time on surfing

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the

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nternet for

education related

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education-related

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matters.Meanwhile,they are

also

suffering from vision

provlem

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problem

problems

at an early age.

Secondly

,few young masses are taking their

smart phone

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smartphone

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as a basic

requirements

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requirement

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of their daily life and they are giving focus on

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the

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irtual

word

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world

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of internet.

This

tendency in those group age is making people more introvert and

also

they are losing the and way of following their

ancestors

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ancestor's

ancestors'

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cultures and traditions. They are finding

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ard to expose themselves with the outside society and nature.

For instance

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the

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ature of the young people on

sociel

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social

media and with

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the

show examples

ommunity is totally different with a few one. In conclusion,teenagers are giving their maximum time on

smart phones

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smartphones

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which is badly becoming the major factor for detioring their education and

also

the problems related

with

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vision as well as physical fitness.

Submitted by namunakarki23 on Sat Jan 16 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

234 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today some young people say that their mobile phones are the most important thing they own .Do you think that the popularity of mobile phones is a good or a bad thing?

Fully explain your ideas

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Although more and more people read the news on the Internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. Do you agree or dissagree?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding changes. Others, However, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some parents buy their children whatever they ask for, and allow their children to do whatever they want. Is this a good way to raise children? What consequences could this style of parenting have for children as they get older?