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Writing Samples
Band 8

People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the main problems in cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the main problems people in cities face, and how can these problems be tackled?

#people #cities #face #range #life
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There is no doubt that living in bustling cities can be stressful for some people because high-population cities require intensive maintenance in several public sectors. In
this
 essay, I will discuss the potential problems
along with
 their prospective solutions. The pressing issues faced by those who are living in metropolitan cities are housing and
transportation
. There are frequent cases of one’s job wage not being in proportion with the workloads, and companies do not obey the minimum wage of
employees
.
Consequently
, resulting in most
employees
 are not able to afford housing and spend most of their career living in boarding houses.
Additionally
, there is noticeable inadequate public
transportation
, henceforth, forcing citizens to utilize private
transportation
, resulting in traffic congestion. Examining the potential solutions, both issues can be solved through innovative and well-managed initiatives by governments. The government can strictly force companies to obey the stipulation regarding the labourers’ welfare.
For instance
, in Indonesia, there is a stipulation mentioning that companies must provide minimum regional wage to their
employees
, and register them with national health insurance. By executing
this
 initiative,
employees
 in a highly developed city can afford proper housing because their workloads are in proportion to their salary.
Furthermore
, discussing reducing traffic jams, the government should invest heavily in the convenience and security aspects of public
transportation
.
As a result
, there will be a progressive switch from private to public
transportation
 and will reduce traffic jams significantly. At its core, governments play vital roles in reducing these problems significantly,
however
, the plans’ execution must be well-observed and managed.
Submitted by manapapuja2 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are well-presented, ensure to balance the expansion across all points, ensuring each problem and solution is developed equally.
Task Achievement
Try to integrate more varied examples to support the problems and solutions discussed more robustly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider refining sentence structure to enhance readability and prevent complex sentences from becoming slightly convoluted.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with a well-defined introduction and conclusion, as well as distinct paragraphs for problems and solutions.
Task Achievement
You effectively address the task, providing a comprehensive response to the question about problems in cities and potential solutions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • metropolis
  • commute
  • public transportation
  • gridlock
  • air pollution
  • noise pollution
  • expensive housing
  • exorbitant prices
  • work-life balance
  • recreation areas
  • parks and gardens
  • criminal activities
  • security measures
  • density
  • neighborhood
  • public amenities
  • healthcare facilities
  • educational institutions
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