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Band 7.5

Some parents think it is good to have mobile phones for their children, others disagree with it. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#parents #phones #children
Mobile
phones
 are a crucial part of all
people
 daily life,
although
, some parents think that juveniles having their own cell
phones
 is highly important, others believe it might be detrimental.
This
 essay will discuss both sides in details. There are many reasonable reasons for a child to have a cell phone as some youngsters are so hard to control,
therefore
 by giving them a phone they can be checked on 24/7 especially with the new google map technology which provides a precise location of every one. Another reason is
phones
 are proven to assist young
people
 with social anxiety to obtain friends because they are scared to talk to other children in person so it would be easier to talk to them online. A recent study concluded that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because of mobile
phones
 it is simpler now for young
people
 to have new friends.
On the other hand
,
phones
 can be very harmful to adolescents as sometimes it is a huge distraction from school and from doing their daily homework,
thus
, it might disrupt education in general. Because a lot of teachers are complaining about the influence of
phones
 in school, they urge parents not to buy cell
phones
 for their children.
Moreover
, there are a lot of inappropriate contents on the internet that children should not access, but by
phones
,it is almost impossible to cease them from accessing these contents.
For instance
, nowadays young
people
 are more fond of violence because it is very popular online. To conclude, mobile
phones
 can help parents track their young sons and daughters,
however
, it may m affect their grades and take away their attention from school.
Submitted by Obada ALi on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Mobile technology
  • parental supervision
  • safety concerns
  • educational apps
  • inappropriate content
  • cyberbullying
  • distractions
  • parental controls
  • psychosocial development
  • screen time
  • age-appropriate
  • digital literacy
  • social interaction
  • communication device
  • responsibility
  • cognitive development
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